"Gingham Dog and Calico Cat" by Dahlov Ipcar
2003     Oil on Linen     20" x 24"
© Dahlov Ipcar Arts Collection LLC, used with permission, all rights reserved

The gingham dog and the calico cat
Side by side on the table sat;
'Twas half-past twelve, and whadda-ya-think?
Neither one had slept a wink!
The old Dutch clock and the Chinese plate
Feared they knew as sure as fate,
There would be one terrible spat,
'Tween the gingham dog and the calico cat!
(I wasn't there; I simply state
What I was told by the Chinese plate!)

The gingham dog he went, "Bow-wow!"
And the calico cat she replied, "Mee-ow!"
The air was littered in an hour or so,
With bits of gingham and calico;
The old Dutch clock in the chimney-place
Threw up its hands before its face;
For it always dreaded a family row,
And to stop it, well, no one knew how.
(Mind I'm only a-telling you
What the old Dutch clock swears is true!)

The Chinese plate looked so blue,
And wailed, "Oh, dear, what shall we do!"
For the gingham dog and the calico cat
Tossed and tumbled this way and that,
Employing every tooth and claw
In the awfullest way you ever saw—
And how that gingham and calico flew!
That was some duel between them two!
(Don't fancy I exaggerate—
I got my news from the Chinese plate!)

Early next morn where the two had sat,
There was no trace of dog or cat;
Some folks think unto this day
That burglars stole that pair away!
But the truth about that cat and pup
Is that they et each other up!
Now what do you really think 'bout that--
The duel between that dog and cat!
(The old Dutch clock it told me so,
And that is how I come to know.)

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The Duel

Poem by Eugene Field, 1850-1895

The gingham dog and the calico cat
Side by side on the table sat;
'Twas half-past twelve, and (what do you think!)
Nor one nor t'other had slept a wink!
The old Dutch clock and the Chinese plate
Appeared to know as sure as fate
There was going to be a terrible spat.
(I wasn't there; I simply state
What was told to me by the Chinese plate!)

The gingham dog went "Bow-wow-wow!"
And the calico cat replied "Mee-ow!"
The air was littered, an hour or so,
With bits of gingham and calico,
While the old Dutch clock in the chimney-place
Up with its hands before its face,
For it always dreaded a family row!
(Now mind: I'm only telling you
What the old Dutch clock declares is true!)

The Chinese plate looked very blue,
And wailed, "Oh, dear! what shall we do!"
But the gingham dog and the calico cat
Wallowed this way and tumbled that,
Employing every tooth and claw
In the awfullest way you ever saw—
And, oh, how the gingham and calico flew!
(Don't fancy I exaggerate—
I got my news from the Chinese plate!)

Next morning, where the two had sat
They found no trace of dog or cat;
And some folks think unto this day
That burglars stole that pair away!
But the truth about the cat and pup
Is this: they ate each other up!
Now what do you really think of that!
(The old Dutch clock it told me so,
And that is how I came to know.)

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